if you’re going to leave, that’s fine.
and I know you promised you wouldn’t
seven months ago while I was crying
into your neck but I also know that
sometimes it rains even when it’s not
supposed to and sometimes boys
kiss girls they shouldn’t and we tear
flowers out of the ground just to watch
them die and things change,
so I understand if you’re done,
but please, when you’re packing all your
old sweaters and books, don’t forget
to take all your three AM phone calls,
and photographs where we’re smiling
so wide it looks like we’ve never known
that feeling in the pit of your stomach
when someone screams “I don’t love you
Take back every kiss, every night you
fell asleep next to me, every poem I
wrote you, every song you sang to
me, every “I love you more fight,”
every shock I felt in my skin when
you brushed against me.
I was never scared of ghosts until you
left but now I see you everywhere and
god if you’re going to kill me please
just do it quickly because I see you
in everything and it’s making it hard
#repost @_endometriosis #endometriosis #pcos #fighter #chronicillness #spoonie
CW: 127 (86 lbs down!)
GW: idk anymore, I just want to build some more muscle now.
The picture on the left might be the only one I have near my highest of 213. It’s almost difficult remembering how uncomfortable and completely unhappy I was. Not just because none of my clothes fit, but because I knew I was terribly unhealthy.
I reached a point where I couldn’t stand being obese anymore. I wanted to be strong and healthy, and so began my journey. There have been ups and downs and a learning curve, but I didn’t give up and I didn’t look back. You’ll fall off the wagon, it doesn’t matter, get back on. You’ll slip up once in a while and have meals that aren’t the healthiest and aren’t ideal, it doesn’t matter, get back on track. Push yourself, don’t give up, keep learning and fighting for yourself.
It doesn’t take any insane diets or crazy exercise routines. It requires learning about health and nutrition, feeding your body positive and delicious foods, and finding work outs you enjoy.
It took a lot of work, and I still have work ahead of me, and it is all worth it.